sunshine on this rainy day

a conversation that brightened up my day... just one of those days when i get to talk with my alter ego about life and the ups and downs of life itself :)



BUZZ!!!
polen_angel21: =))
karen madrid: nag cr
polen_angel21: =))
karen madrid: hintayin pa kita sa monday bago ako magpa book?
polen_angel21: kaya pala may naamoy ako eh
karen madrid: ahaha, ihi lang yun grabe ka
karen madrid: sabagay umutot din pala ako
karen madrid: hahahaha
polen_angel21: :))
polen_angel21: picturan ko nails ko maya
polen_angel21: tag kita
karen madrid: uu may weefee nmn maya sa bahay. sana lang maging friendly yung neighbor namin
karen madrid: susunduin ako ni tito bharl dito sa office kasi hindi ko keri mga dala ko, masakit ang rayuma ko hahahaha
polen_angel21: nyahahahahah ndi mo dalhin ung bag  eh d hila lng nman un
karen madrid: madudumihan ang gulong
karen madrid: nilinisan ko na eh
polen_angel21: kahit bgay mo na sa ate mo ung isang flowery na dress
karen madrid: feeling ko nga hihingin nya kaya hindi ko dadalhin
polen_angel21: gaga ibigay mo na
polen_angel21: marami ka pa nman sa box eh
karen madrid: susuotin ko muna waaaaa.. isa lng  hahaha
karen madrid: cge na nga dalhin ko na
polen_angel21: wag ung red!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
polen_angel21: WAG UNG REDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
karen madrid:
polen_angel21: sbihin mo kukunin ko pa syo un kpag pumayat ako
polen_angel21:  =))
karen madrid: oo hindi, iiwan ko dito sken
karen madrid: =))
polen_angel21: sayang kc ndi nabitbit ung iba pero dbale
polen_angel21: mga sept or oct magpapabox ako
polen_angel21: *crossing fingers*
polen_angel21: nawento ko ba syo?
karen madrid: na????
polen_angel21: nakakausap ko c ******
polen_angel21: tinanong ko about s ******
karen madrid: o tapos?
polen_angel21: tapos tsaka ko na wento
polen_angel21: =))
polen_angel21: bitin much?
karen madrid: adik ka waaaaaa!!!!!!
polen_angel21: =))
karen madrid: cge na!!!!!!
karen madrid: waaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!
polen_angel21: nyahahahaha

polen_angel21: kahit papanu inaabutan ako ni Lord ng pampagising
polen_angel21: mnsan nga lam mo nagdodoubt nko
polen_angel21: kc sobra sobra ang dumating smin eh
polen_angel21: ung tipong kakatapos lng ng isa
polen_angel21: may isa na agad na sunod
polen_angel21: pahinga nman pwede
karen madrid: nasosolve nmn eh diba? so why doubt?
polen_angel21: ung tipong give us a few months to stand up again before knocking us out again
polen_angel21: kc nga kapag andun ka na s time na un feeling mo
polen_angel21: theres no other way out
polen_angel21: nyahahahaha
polen_angel21: isa lng ang exit
polen_angel21: and the exit is through a ring of fire
karen madrid: ahaha, ang dramatic nmn nung exit mo
polen_angel21: =))
karen madrid: at least ang graceful ng exit diba??
karen madrid: hahahaha
polen_angel21: ung exit door mismo ang ring of fire
polen_angel21: kaya lng pagka exit mo there's more to come sbi ng sign
karen madrid: parang circus lang ahh
polen_angel21: oo ung laro s family computer nun
karen madrid: e syempre yun yung tinatawag na "exhibitions"
karen madrid: talagang bongga yun!
polen_angel21: nakaexit nko
polen_angel21: andito nko s mas matinding level ng exhibitions
polen_angel21: buti nlng anjan ka
polen_angel21: may sideshow
karen madrid: nyahahaha! may side show pag nasusunog costume mo
karen madrid: hahahahaah
polen_angel21: o db mas simple buhay s pinas
polen_angel21: kc kahit mahirap
karen madrid: ang baba ng level ko ahh  pero ok lang,i have my own show nmn .. tas ikaw ang sideshow dun
polen_angel21: kaya nmana ng hirap
polen_angel21: nyahahahahaha
polen_angel21: i guess each of us have a different show in our lives
polen_angel21: but there will always be someone who will be ur sideshow
polen_angel21: and give u moral support if the show gets out of hand
karen madrid: of courseIm willing to set my FAME aside para mag sideshow sayo
polen_angel21: =))
karen madrid:  =))
polen_angel21: anu ka ba eh sideshow nman ako s show mo
polen_angel21: double sikat ntin dito
karen madrid: may time din nmn na nakawan ng spotlight , at ito yun
karen madrid: panira lng ng moment
polen_angel21: so far ndi mo pa nman ninanakaw spotlight ko eh
polen_angel21: baka ndi mo kayanin ang show
karen madrid: ninakaw ko lang, hindi mo lang alam
karen madrid: ako sa simula, yung exhibition sayo na
polen_angel21: =))
polen_angel21: iba ang nagnanakaw ng spotlight stin
karen madrid: ahahaha! sinooooooooooooo???????
polen_angel21: >:)
polen_angel21: isipin mo nlng kelangan ntin ng kontrabida s show kung ndi
polen_angel21: masyadong lame ang show ng buhay ntin
karen madrid: pwede nmn na tayo tayo na lang magkontrabidahn sa mga show natin, at least mapapatawad natin ang each other,

what will i ever do without you my beloved yaya :) i love you to the bones :)

Dear nanay,

I will surely miss your smile...

The sound of your laughter...

Yung mga lambing mo na papabili ng prutas...

I already miss the sound of your voice...

Kahit na malaki nko nung nagkita ulit tyo nila tatay, you welcomed us with arms wide open...

Kahit na anu pang sabihin nila, you have always been good to us...

Ikaw lng nay at c tatay ang nagpapalakas ng loob namin dito...

Kayo lng ang dahilan bakit kme umuuwi jan...

Lam ko alam mo kung gaano ko kagusto umuwi at alam ko naiintindihan mo ako...

Sorry ha ndi ko natupad last wish mo...

Ang umuwi kami lahat jan...

Pero anjan naman c mama eh... alam ko na alam mo na lahat ng nangyayari ngayon...

Kaw na bahala sa amin ha nay... 

Wag ka magaalala nding ndi namin pababayaan c tatay promise yan...

Alam ko nagaalala ka para sa kanya but be assured, mama will surely take care of him... alam mo rin yan...

At least ngayon wala ka ng nararamdaman na sakit... pahinga ka na... antayin mo kme jan ha... magkikita din tyo ulit... at alam ko na susunod na pagkikita ntin, you will still welcome us with arms wide open...

Miss na kita ngyn pa lng... ang sakit sa loob ko na wala kme ni bouying jan ngyn... pro alam mo na ang reason... sila bouying nay uuwi jan next month... bisitahin ka nlng nila... alam ko naiintindihan mo nman eh...

 I love you nay... lam mo yan... sana kahit papanu napasaya ka namin at si tatay... Sige na nay mahaba na toh... bsta usap nlng tyo... ok lng bisitahin mo ako dami ko gusto sabihin syo eh... secret ntin gaya ng dati...

Sa muling pagkikita...

<3,

Tata

letter to my yaya...

dear yaya,
guess what!!! may wifi kme hahahahahaha tas habang nittype ko itong Nobela ko syo nawala :(( Kaya mega copy ako hahahahaha kaloka pasabugin ko nga mga kapitbahay napaka damit Nila these couple of days >:) 
anyway I was listening to the songs in the OSB that bagets, raprap and yourself, downloaded for me ;) I was mostly listening to the songs 600+ kc I knee na ikaw na nag dl nun... talk about being stuck sa panahon ng hapon >:) :)) =)) then I thought of you... of those times na we were searching for acceptance and love from those so called people that we thought were real... I thought about those laughters and tears and those mega emo moments ;) I remembered staying up late so I could chat with you :) and bitch about things that were happening in our lives... then I felt sad... I felt sad for those people that we thought who were real and who loved us... you know why I feel sad for them... because they are missing half of their lives because they shunned us... maganda kc tyo at mga panget sila :)) =) maging emo ako dahil sa songs mo hahahaha wala LNG... I'm just lucky that u didn't believe any of those so called people and stuck by me... I truly believe we are meant to be ;)
para tyong c Meredith grey at Christina yang :)) soulmates :)) soulmates sa kalokohan hahahaha
I love you yaya and God knows that... you are one of the good things that life gave me... and believe me there aren't many so feel priviledged!!! tabi ka konti naapakan ko buhok mo :)) =))
bsta thank you for staying and for loving me... specially for my negative sides :)) =)) >:) mana mana LNG yan >:)
now I have to sign off Baka ndi na Ito Mapost >:)

♥ much love from across the seas ♥
bebegerl

random thoughts 9

Sep 12, '08 11:14 PM for everyone

i have been trying to forget someone whom i was beginning to get close with... we have been talking into the wee hours about life and what we have been through...
at first i thought we would end up as friends but as the days went by, we became close... too close actually... until i learned something...
something that has changed both our lives... instead of staying clear from him, i seem to be getting closer to him... which was wrong...
he went away for a few weeks and i thought that it was my chance to forget him... and it was his chance to settle his life as well... but i was wrong...
while he was away, i missed him... was wondering if he was ok... wondering if he was thinking of me too...

until today... i finally got to talk to him again... and it was then that i realized that he had already conquered the part of me that i have been protecting for a long time...
but i know i must stop this... this can't go on...
this is exactly the reason why i dont let anyone get close to me...

just had to get this out of my system before i go "gaga" over again... hayzzzzzzz...

random thoughts 8

Sep 11, '08 11:07 PM for everyone

my thoughts has been running wild lately...
my hands were itching to grab a piece of paper & start writing...
i guess it has been a long time since ive written or voiced out my thoughts..

i usually get like this at this time of the year..
i guess it has something to do with me adding on another year here on earth hehhehehe
i look back and think what have i achieved...
everytime i ask that question, the answer still keeps evading me...

as i look back into life, i begin to wonder if i'll ever find that part of me that's still missing...
i'm still hoping though... still searching...
and i know someday i will...
i will find that something that will COMPLETE me...

random thoughts 7

(aug.7'08)

sometimes i look at myself in the mirror...
i see a girl smiling...
i see someone who seems happy...

but who is she?
this cant be me?
is this what other people see?

someone who is happy go lucky?
someone who loves to laugh..
someone who makes others laugh...

but no one really sees the real me...
no one sees this heart of mine crying..
no one sees me when im hurt...

no one knows when im really lonely...
no one knows that sometimes i just like to listen & not say a word...
no one knows sometimes i also need someone to listen...

no one really knows me
even i myself dont know the real me...
who am i really?????

random thoughts 6

( aug.5,'08)

couldnt sleep at all last night...
i was wondering if u were missing me too...
for i know deep in my heart ive been missing you...

i remember all those laughters we used to share...
all the memories that we've had...
all those arguments about our past...

is it possible to miss you this much...
its like i cant breath the air around me anymore...
nothings the same without you in my arms...

i woke up to no sunshine this morning...
is this a bad sign?
is it warning me about something?

all i know is that i miss you so...
and i hope you will never let go....

random thoughts 5

( aug.5,'08)

another day has passed without any word from you...
im worrying about you...
do you still think of me?

im wondering if you're missing me too...
its been a long time since we last talked...
now im thinking if i said something wrong...

im dying to ask you how you are...
if you're ok and how are getting through...
oh damn it i hate this feeling of missing you...

random thoughts 3

(july 28,'08)

missing you at this moment...
wishing i could hold you tight & never let go...
wishing i could personally say i love you...

missing the days we used to talk...
missing those silly remarks of yours...
missing how your laughter sounded...

tears are suddenly falling...
thinking of you always makes me sad...
it always reminds me of what we will never have...

how i wish life could have been different...
how i wish we could have been together...
oh how i wish i could hold you now and forever....

random thoughts 2

(jan. 8,'08)

tears are falling now...
trying to stop them somehow...
i miss you so much...
wish i could feel your touch...

loving you has been a pleasure...
youre someone in my life that i really treasure...
loving you has been hard too...
i cant show you that what i hold in my heart is true...

days pass wondering about you...
days spent daydreaming of what may come...
everyday my love seems to grow stronger...
but i cant show how i truly feel...

oh when will the time come for me to show you...
that what i feel inside is more than you'll ever know...
i hope someday fate will be on my side...
and give me time to show you what i truly feel inside...

iloveyou and that's all that i know...
no reasons... no questions asked...
im falling freely each day...
i just hope that somehow deep inside you, you feel the same way...

random thoughts 1

(dec. 16,'07)

longing to hear your voice again...
longing to feel your warm embrace...
longing to finally see your face...

been lost for words on how i feel...
trying to seize the moment again...
when i could write about this love i have...

but fate has been against us since the start...
trying to slowly tear us apart...
making us change what's inside our hearts...

oh love of mine please dont go astray...
just hold on & dont go away...
for losing you would make my world grey...